Summer Camp

Summer Camp So i have never been to any type of real summer camp. I'm dying to go to one this summer. When I was doing my research I found one I'd love, but probably can't go to.  It's an overnight camp in Vermont, which is really far away. It's an LGBTQ camp. There are normal camp activities and then things that are to help LGBT people. The idea appeals to me a lot. Plus it'd give me a real reason to come out, and I'm afraid that without one I never will.  If anyone has some magical beans or a teleporter I'd appreciate them right about now. It's actually a cheap camp, so of transportation can be arranged I'm good to go.  May life be as awesome as you are and DFTBA!!!!!!!!!!

Visible Change

So my friend broke up with the crazy bitch girlfriend. Finally. I've been talking to him all weekend, and holy crap.  I knew he'd changed while he was dating her. I consciously knew it. But wow. He's still not quite himself, cause he's upset. But he's starting to sound like the guy I became friends with. I can finally remember why I was fighting so hard for this relationship. When he isn't with a girl he's a great guy. He's sweet and polite and respectful. He treats me like I'm special. It is hard to explain how much I missed having him in my life.  I hate how hurt he is though. I would just like to say straight up that cheating and lying are wrong. If you aren't into someone say no. Break up. Don't lie or cheat or try to hold onto nothing. It's wrong and so unfair to them. In my version of hell you have a special place. More on that in a later post.  The other thing I have to say is to listen to your friends. If they all tell you something is wrong with a person then there probably is. If they all tell you you are changing in a bad way or whatever. Listen to them. These people want what is best for you always and so you need to treat them well and not ignore them.  This a rant, sorry. Ill try to be better tomorrow. May life be as awesome as you are and DFTBA!!!!!!

Mama Bear

You know that image you get when you imagine a mother protecting her young? Like a bear or some other wild animal. That overwhelming need to protect them at any cost to themselves. It doesn’t matter if they get hurt or how hard it is. They have to protect them.

I have a group of friends who calls me mom with good reason. I feel that overwhelming need to protect them. They are my family and I can’t see them hurt.

So when some bitch whore comes along and hooks up with my best friend and son under false pretenses I’m pretty pissed. Learn to control yourself.

People need to learn that there are lines and you just can’t cross them because it is so not okay.

May life be as awesome as you are and DFTBA!!!!!!!!!

Double Lives

Have you ever ears the song online by Brad Paisley? Even if it isn't your type of music, the lyrics are really great. The concept is about the people we are online. You can be short, overweight, and live at home. But as the guy in the song says 'I'm so much cooler online.'  In real life I'm a pretty miserable person. Like I hate a lot of people and I'm so far from being perfect and decent. I have trouble trusting people. I'm painfully shy. And I can be really mean.  Online I'm more honest and I try to be a better person. Others are worse people online. I think it's about that shield of anonymity. For me I can be honest about how I feel and my beliefs and my past. Sure people can judge me, but if you judge me it doesn't hurt as much. I don't know you, and you don't know me. I can be out and fully supportive of gay marriage and equality and be a liberal. In my real life I don't feel like I can. So many of my friends are die hard republicans/conservatives.  For other people it's the opposite. If you don't know who I am then I can say whatever I want. I can tell you your an idiot, or whatever awful thing I want. It's that anonymity. It's also the protection of a screen. If you curse me out in real life I'll bitch at you, and maybe hit you. Posting on Facebook prevents that immediate reaction.  I think the anonymity has both it's advantages and disadvantages. It allows us to in a way be more honest and free to express ourselves. However, it also makes it easier for people to try to hurt you.  This has a few causes. One is that I follow two youtubers on tumblr. They have rude people send them all kinds of messages about being dumb, or ugly, or fags on anon. It pisses me off to see people abusing their anonymity. They are just doing these things to be spiteful.  The other reason being myself. Online I am an out of the closet pansexual. I've dated. I believe in equality for everyone regardless of race, sex, gender, religion, or sexual orientation. I'm a liberal independent thinker.  The last reason being a facebook post. Don't say anything online you wouldn't say to someone's face. It's cowardly and childish.  I think we all need to use our anonymity for good. Instead of using the Internet as a shield to hurt people lets use it as a tool to get good honest messages out there.  May life be as awesome as you are and DFTBA!!!!

Violence Needs to Stop

So violence isn't news to anyone, especially if your from the US.  Violence in fiction is what I intended to focus on, but I'm gonna branch out later. Now in fictional novels violence is used as a tool. Harry Potter kills the ones you love to remind you there were losses in victory and that no one benefits from war. In Hunger Games the violence shows how far humanity has fallen and how they're trying to trivialize violence. I'm gonna go on with the Hunger Games briefly. I feel like the movie trivialized the violence too much. The only scene that you felt it was Rue's death. I also think that it was better with them just sending the bread. The fight coming then seemed like revenge, instead of what the bread was. It was supposed to be a sign that they realized what she'd done and that these people were just humans too. The movie also focused more on love triangle aspect then on how truly wrong the violence was or the psychological aspects of the games. As a society we can show gore and blood in films, but we censor emotional thing. If a person use any type of strong language it's a higher film rating than if you show someone being shot or stabbed. We're afraid of emotion, but become desensitized to violence.  Someone I know spent time in a country with a very low violence and teen pregnancy issue. She learned that their television censored more violence, but was more honest about sex and emotion which I think might be a better bet.  Violence just breeds violence. When a violent act is committed we want harm to come to the perpetrator which just causes more hate and violence. Instead we need to remind people that it's wrong. I think we should concentrate on a different aspect.  Who can name 3-5 serial killers? Jack the Ripper, Charles Manson, the Boston Strangler, etc.  Who can name 3-5 victims of serial killings? I can't and neither an most people.  We focus on the criminals, when we ought to focus on the victims. On helping people recover, aiding families of victims, and improving things do there's less violence. 

Apocalyptic Obsession BEDA

So I think it is safe to say we as a society are a little bit obsessed with the apocalypse. I mean who hasn't watched a movie or a tv show about it. If you say you haven't then you are a liar. So as an actual project at School Suck a Lot for English we had to write an apocalyptic plan and an essay about why people are so obsessed and what we think is the most likely end of days possibility.  Now I'm go through this backwards from how I did things. First of all most likely apocalypse? Really? I don't think that anyone can predict with statistics or logic what is the most likely. As a Christian, a term I use loosely, I believe that no one know the day or the hour of how we'll all end. And even more basic I don't care! Now I'd like to specify why I feel that way. One I don't care. I'm not in the 68% who fear death. It's coming to all of us eventually. Why waste life being afraid r worrying? Two, it doesn't matter. We can't change things and so instead of putting so much effort into figuring it out I have a better idea. Lets treat each other with human decency and be honest. Let's forgive others and apologize for our mistakes. Basically if the world ended right now you ought to be fine. Don't let the last thing you do be negative by being a better person. Now as for why I feel people are obsessed its probably a few things. One, it's an excuse to do crazy stupid stuff. Two, it earns certain people a lot of money. Three, if we know when it's all gonna end we'll be able to make things right by that time.  So for all the reasons above I had a tough time with this project, but I did learn something about myself and the world. People are afraid of the end. I don't want to be afraid, I want to be satisfied if it comes because life is too short.  May life be as awesome as you are and DFTBA!

Enough is Enough BEDA

Real blog post today!! So at some point on everyone's life they have to look at what's going on and realize something is wrong that is fixable. They have to say that enough is enough and stand up for themselves. It'll be hard, and it'll change things forever.  I had one of those moments today. Patrick, who I've mentioned a lot, is honestly a terrible friend. We argue all the time. He hurts me over and over and then spins it so I feel bad about what I did. His sister Victoria and I get along mostly, and his girlfriend and I just pretend we do for his sake. Two or three times he's hit me or grabbed me and left bruises.  Recently I told him for the third time I couldn't keep doing this and gave him an ultimatum. He had to honestly answer 2 questions, and always be honest with me from there on. The first he answered right away. The second he didn't know and I said I'd wait. When he finally texted me an answer it was crap. Me and all our close friends knew from reading it that he was lying. So I spent a few days thinking. We didn't talk, cause he didn't make the effort and I was busy.  Last night I had a nightmare. Instead of the mental abuse I've been dealing with he started actually hitting me instead of siding his words. So I did some dream analysis and thought about our relationship and where I am and all this stuff. Then I had the ahah moment.  I talked to my friend and she agreed with my conclusion. Enough is enough. When he's ready to act like a mature decent person we'll talk. I don't know how it'll go, but I'm hoping it'll make me feel better about myself and my life.  Hard decision always matter the most. I've been on the verge of this for ages. I know I'll probably have trouble, but I'm moving on.  May life be as awesome as you are and DFTBA!

Day of Silence

So I've only been posting on my other blog. Nothing important has happened and my posts have sucked. You haven't missed much.

So tomorrow is Day of Silence. It’s a big deal for me as a pansexual. I am statistically more likely to commit suicide or be bullied. That’s a sad fact. We shouldn’t be afraid to come out because of how we’ll be treated and we shouldn’t want to kill ourselves for something we can’t control.

I’ll be posting tomorrow about my experience.

May life be as awesome as you are and DFTBA!

An Open Letter to Standardized Tests

An Open Letter to FCAT (Florida’s Standardized Test for you lucky bastards who don’t live here)

You suck. Somehow you seem to think you can assess everyone in a 58 question multiple choice test administered over 2 days. To make this better you penalize kids for being fast readers. If I finish before time is over I’m left staring in pure silence for hours. To make this better you punish kids for reading slowly, because they can’t finish. You punish kids who need sound to concentrate. You make everyone miserable.

Best Wishes,
Lizzie

This is an idea stolen from Crash Course on YouTube. Basically FCAT is a test that tells the state about kids who fall in their perfect bubble of medium speed readers who can work in silence and tortures the rest of us till we are unrecognizable. Yay!

May life be as awesome as you are and DFTBA!

Ten Things I Like About Me BEDA

So there’s a new thing going around Youtube where you list your ten favorite things about yourself. Most people are doing 5 physical and 5 that aren’t. Since I’ve had a lot of negative posts I figured I’d do this one to be more positive. I challenge you to come up with this list too. It’s good for you, especially if you have trouble loving yourself, which I do. 1. My eyes. I have eyes that change color from blue to grey or green. They depend on my mood. I’m even gonna give you a picture of them. I’m not wearing makeup and it’s fully unedited. 2. My hands. I have really tiny hands, but I like them. I can reach in small spaces, and then my fingers are actually pretty long. 3. Flexibility. I’m immensely flexible. Not to be a pervert or anything, but I am. I like stretching. I’ve always been in the higher percentiles here, although I suck at most physical activities. 4. My calves. I have fairly muscular calves, and I just like them more than most of my body. 5. My ears. I have really tiny ears, but I really love my piercings. I have three in each ear, and I’m going to get fourth ones soon. I’m really excited. 6. I’m really smart. I’m in the 99th percentiles in everything for my age. My reading has been at college level since I was like 7. I’m pretty proud of myself here. 7. I’m incredibly protective. You will not hurt the people I love. You just won’t. I don’t deal well with it at all. If I care about someone I will fight to the death for them. 8. I am sarcastic as hell. Most people see this as a flaw, but I love it. It’s my natural personality, and there’s nothing I can do about it. 9. I’m determined. This is a fancy way of saying stubborn as hell. I am immensely stubborn. Yesterday my friend and I were arguing for ten minutes before we agreed to stop, since we both knew we were right. I will not give in to anything without a lot of proof that I am wrong or it is necessary for someone I love. 10. I love the way I am with kids. I don’t have much patience for adults or teenagers or preteens, but I love kids. This bugs people sometimes. If you are under the age of eight I have never ending patience for you. I love this about myself. So these are ten things I love about myself. I’m probably gonna do ten things I hate about myself soon, since that’s an easy list. This was actually really hard. I’m proud I could do it. I think it’s important to remember to love ourselves occasionally. I hate my body, and I hate my personality. Occasionally I have to stop and remember I do have goo features as well. No one is all bad and no one is all good. It’s about taking both in stride. May life be as awesome as you are and DFTBA!

Breaking Point

Everyone has a breaking point. I hit mine today, and I'm hoping a friend of mine did too.  So my friend Patrick and I were arguing and I went to walk away to cool off. He grabbed my arm. Now Patrick is about 6'4, and he works put constantly. I'm 5'2 and fair skinned. I pulled my arm and he wouldn't let go. This was a breaking point that I won't soon forget. I have a gorgeous hand print on my arm to remind me. I hissed at him to let the fuck go of me and yanked hard enough to break his grip.  We mostly worked things out. Mostly. Like all friendships we're still working. We're trying to deal with a major issue we had. I guess we work well because we both care. We have a lot invested in each other.  Now he and his girlfriend fought all night. She's not the most pleasant and everything she says is passive aggressive. He made his usual I'm done face, so I'm hoping they're done soon as awful as that is.  Everyone has a breaking point. Mine is a blue and black bruise on my arm where I knew. We would either fix things or never speak again, because when I have a mark we know shit is going down.  May life be as awesome as you are and DFTBA!

Formal Events Suck BEDA

So I’d like to talk about some of the crazy stuff we do as women to get ready for important events, as I have one tomorrow night. I mean like formal events. The type where women wear dresses and heels. I don’t know if anyone really thinks about it, but those events are so bad for women’s self esteem and stuff. Men think women dress for them, but the truth is that it’s all about the other girls. We judge each other a lot. I don’t know if guys know this, but the preparation for these things starts months in advance. At least two week, but up to a few months, before the dress shopping starts. We go to multiple stores and try on dresses. Half of them don’t fit, a bunch make you look awful. These things are literally made slightly smaller than actual sizes, and most women can only wear like three styles. They are also hugely uncomfortable. For me personally I’m a fan of the ‘it fits, and I don’t look fat, I’m buying it’ approach. Some women though are even pickier. Here you also have to think about the judgments. If it’s too long you’re a nun. If it’s too short you’re a hooker. If you show a lot of cleavage you’re a slut. If you show none then you have no chest, even if you do. Then there is all the rest of the shopping. Finding shoes to wear to these events is a careful balance. If you wear heels that are too high people will say you look like a hooker. If they’re too short or wedges it looks like you don’t know how to walk in real heels. Not even to mention how uncomfortable heels are. If you wear flats then women assume you can’t wear heels, plus the stuff the bottoms are made of sticks to floors. Let’s just say it: Women will judge you based on your shoes. If you keep them on, take them off, what style they are, how they match your outfit, etc. There is a lot to buying shoes. Then there’s jewelry. It has to look nice. If you don’t have money then you have to figure out what your gonna do. You can’t buy things that look fake, but real stuff is expensive. Plus you have to decide if you want to make a statement with your accessories. If you have money you have to make sure not to buy anything too showy, but nothing too casual either. Now about two days before the actual getting ready starts, which is outrageous. Women are obsessed with being tan. They’ll either go tanning, or buy fake tan, or use a natural remedy around this day. It’s enough time for it to fade, but enough that it’ll still be there. If you can tell it’s a fake tan, instant judgment. If you’re too pale, judgment. Plus women will use something on their faces to make sure their skin is perfectly clear. This is also when they’ll start whitening teeth if the method take multiple days, like many natural methods. The day before, women shave and practice all their makeup. That’s right people. Women practice the hair and makeup stuff at least once. It has to be perfect, so they make sure it’s all gonna work perfectly. Plus you have to shave the day before, in case you get razor burn or anything like that. Then comes the day of the event, which is really stressful. The whole process takes hours. First, women are gonna do their nails. These have to be done early so they have time to dry. But they can’t be done in advance, because chipped nail polish is tacky. They have to match your accessories, but not too closely. It’s a fine line. Too much and you look like you are trying too hard. Too little and then you just had them done for something else. After you have your nails done, and hours have been spent letting them dry and doing nothing else you’ll move on. I do mean hours. They have to have firmly set. There are tricks to help here. Ice water, out the door top coats, or all sorts of other tricks women use. The next step is to shower. You have to really wash your hair and make sure it’s conditioned well because it’s probably gonna undergo some significant heat later. You have to wash your face and spot treat any pimples you may still have. Then comes the hair. You’ll blow dry it out. Then comes the curlers/straighteners and products. Now if your hair is hardened by products that’s tacky. If your style comes out before the night is over it’s also not okay. Too wild of curls are also bad. Wavy hair isn’t okay, because it looks like you don’t know what you wanted. Once your hair is done you’ll do your makeup. This starts with bronzers. Then foundation. Once all that base stuff is done comes the real makeup. Too much and you’re a prostitute. Too little and you’re a child. There’s even more judgment here that I won’t get into, but including eye makeup, lipstick, blush, and everything else. Then you get dressed. Once you’re dressed you touch everything up again. It’s all a mess and takes up the whole day. You know you’re going to be judged anyway, but we try really hard not to be. It’s really frustrating for me. Maybe if we could all be nicer to each other this whole ordeal would be easier and more fun for us all. May life be as awesome as you are and DFTBA!

Time To Be Honest Part 2 BEDA

So the next thing from my list of major life issues is what I'm gonna do in the future. After visiting FAU today it felt very fitting.  I'm a straight A student and I always have been. I've never had to try very hard in school to get my graded and it's led other people to expect certain things from me. My PSAT scores are in the 95, 97, and 99th percentiles in writing, math, and reading respectively.  Today I had an admin at my school ask me about going to med school. A lot of adult have asked me about med school, law school, or even Harvard/ other Ivy Leagues. It's not a question to them of what I want to do. It's just expected that that's what I'm going to do. I'm supposed to be a doctor, lawyer, or CEO.  My parents are a little better, but not fully. When I expressed an interest in writing my dad decided I should be a journalist. He still brings it up even after me telling him I don't want to. More than once. My mom is terrified. She wants me to stay close to home, but doesn't care what I study. I'm supposed to get married, have kids, and be successful.  So I've done a lot of research and thinning. I want to major in either creative writing or child psych, probably psych. That's what I WANT. I also know my first choice school is Cornell. I'm also looking into Penn State, Syracuse, and Vanderbuilt among others.  As for even longer term future. I want to write novels. But as a 'real job' I want to work with social work/children. As per getting married and having kids I don't know. I want kids. I want them relatively young. Marriage is complicated though, because of my sexuality. If I fall for a girl then it's all more complicated.  I have faith things will get clearer. That's what I live on.  May life be as awesome as you are and DFTBA!

Suicide? BEDA

So I suffer from clinical depression. I have on and off for about 5 years. It’s genetic and my asthma medication has it as a side effect.

For people who don’t know clinical depression isn’t just feeling sad. It’s a dark cloud that constantly hovers over you. On bad days you don’t want to move or get up out of bed. On good days it’s still there on the sidelines. It makes the things you like less fun, and things you don’t unbearable. If you don’t know that a person suffers from it, you’ve probably still noticed. They can be quiet, withdrawn, and unnoticeable or they can be unbearably pessimistic and awful.

I’d been doing well, but last year things got really bad. I remember sitting on a bench in a park. In my purse I had letters written. One for my mom, one for my dad, and one for each of my 2 closest friends. I also had one for the police.They were labeled and sealed. I’d cleared anything I wouldn’t want found. I was sitting there with a handful of sleeping pills and cold medicine in one hand and an open bottle of water in front of me. All I could think was that it wasn’t worth the pain anymore. And that no one would care.

Today I saw a video about suicide that touched me. As I watched it I cried. Seeing it made me feel a little better. It reminded me how I wasn’t alone. The person making it kept saying that you are worth it and you deserve help. I will have the link below.

I still will have to fight that battle everyday. The battle to not take the handful of pills and sign those letters. The battle to remember that I matter. It’s never going to end. Some days are harder than others. As long as I live there will be those hard days. I just have to remember that it does get better.

Suicide is never the best choice. If you need help you have options. Talk to someone in your life. If you can’t though there is still help. Call your local suicide hotline. Someone will take your call. If you don’t know the number, need someone immediately, or feel you are in danger call 911. You have better options, and it will get better.

May life be as awesome as you are and DFTBA!!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LTb6YQk_Mew&feature=youtube_gdata_player

Being Miserable BEDA

So today has been the miserable kind of day. I don't want to write a lot today, because it'd be depressing as hell. I have good days and bad days. Today is a bad day. I'll hopefully have something better tomorrow. 

Time To Be Honest Part 1 BEDA

So I'll admit I'm writing this a day early, because I don't know how crazy tomorrow is gonna get. I do know that it doesn't matter when I wrote it though, cause I've been thinking if for a while I've just never said it. Here it is:

So today I was doing a lot of research into sexuality after watching two fabulous youtubers who are transgender who I fell in love with. They were both so wonderful. They knew who they were, even if they weren't the most confident or happy people. Both boys know without a doubt who they are which is inspiring. Links below to their channels.

The things they were saying just made me really start thinking about where I actually am. I've always identified as a female, and that not a question for me. However they both also make references to their sexuality as well as their gender. They aren't the only youtubers like this. I watch a number of people who are openly gay and so on and so forth. These people all seem to know exactly where they stand. 

So I started doing research. Like real research, beyond gay, lesbian, bisexual, or straight. I'd never really known as much about how many different sexualities and genders there are out there. I started looking into all the ones that I didn't know what they meant and finding ones that described me better than I'd known I could be. 

Now the societal normal is heterosexual cisgendered people. I'd be a girl who identifies as a girl who likes boys and only boys. There are however a pretty big group of people who fall outside of that normal grouping. 

Like I said my gender does match my sex. This wasn't ever a question for me, and I'm thankful for that because that's got to be a hard thing to live with.

Sexuality on the other hand is way more complex. I learned that there is a term that I feel very accurately describes me. 

I'm a demisexual. I'm putting a full definition link below, but to summarize I have to have an emotional connection with you to be interested in you. As the website says I'll intially give off just friends vibes, and later end up attracted to you. I've never known there was a term for this, and I'm glad I found it. As is typical with demisexuality I am also pansexual. This means that gender and sex don't matter to me. If I like you and am attracted to you, then that's it.

So I'm 'out' to myself, and to the internet. I'm kinda out to my friend who started the whole thinking, Patrick. I mean he knows that I'm not straight, not all the details. Eventually I'd like to come out fully, but I'm not there yet. 

Since writing this post yesterday I came out to my best friend. It was probably the hardest thing I've ever told anyone, and I've made plenty of embarrassing and tough statements. But having her know felt like a weight came off of me and it's a relief to know that she accepted it as easily as she did. She's a really true friend, and I'm glad it went how it did. It's encouraging. 

May life be as awesome as you are and DFTBA!!!!!!!

http://www.asexuality.org/wiki/index.php?title=Demisexual

http://m.youtube.com/channel/UCNqZZMlqbvFKulx7fUwdD2g

http://m.youtube.com/channel/UCXX0iCrVQnlNvGW4gKEhHdA

Thinking Heavily BEDA

So about a month ago my close friend and I were talking. I just mentioned how confused I've been with a lot of things lately. This includes where I want to go with my life, what I want to do now and in the future, school issues, personal issues, sexuality, etc. He told me that maybe instead of letting my feelings about these things be stress that I should try to separate things into the three categories that were mixing in my head. There's where I am and what I want, what my family expects and thinks, and then what is generally considered normal. I've been working on these things lately and doing a lot of research. I think that in being more honest I'll hopefully be less depressed. 

I think I'm going to go through these thing one by one for a while and work them out with the Internet. As crazy as it sounds telling the Internet makes me feel better. LikeI'm being more honest, even if it's with strangers. I'm not making snap decisions and none of this stuff is new. I guess I'm just sick of trying to be the perfect princess/straight a student/daughter everyone wants me to be it's too much and I want to just be the person I'm comfortable with. 

I think everyone deserves to be happy and I'm working on it. Life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness right? May life be as awesome as you are and DFTBA!

Confused BEDA

So today I don’t have a lot to say today. I’m very confused about a few things in life. I guess I’m wondering about life. People say that you’re supposed to find yourself in high school and to be yourself. Well first I think that is a stupid expression. How can you be anyone other than yourself? It’s frustrating. Two, I don’t like the phrase find yourself. It insinuates that you don’t know where you are now. I disagree with that. I know where I am, I just really hate the place I’m at.

I guess to summarize this unusually short post I’ll rewrite those two stupid phrases. In high school you should try to find out where you want to be and start working on getting there. You should always be the type of person you feel like inside. If you really love something then love it. Figure out what you like and then just like it. Don’t let other people make you feel less than for being the person you are.

May life be as awesome as you are and DFTBA!

Books BEDA

So, I will admit I was running out of ideas so I’m gonna talk about books that not everyone knows about that I like or dislike, because one can never talk too much about books.

Yesterday I was with a friend and decided to talk about a book on my shelf that she noticed. It’s called The Statistical Probability of Love at First Sight. My friends have shortened this to Stats. I adore this book. Is it a logical premise? Absolutely not. Is it adorable? Yes. Does it have some good quotes? Yes. Is it worth reading? If you like young adult romance then yes. It’s a feel good book, so if that’s what you’re looking for then this is a great read.

My most recent read was James Paterson’s the Witch and Wizard series book, The Gift. Now this book is fantasy. The series has a great premise, but as many of his teen books do, I can’t speak for the adult books, it falls a bit flat in execution. That’s not saying it isn’t good. It is a great book. I mean it is truly entertaining. I just feel like it could be better. He uses a lower level of vocabulary and chops the book up into short pieces. It feels like he’s trying too hard to write for young adults rather than adults so it comes off like that uncle who knows nothing about kids trying to talk to you. It’s interesting, but flat because of what it lacks. It’s hard for me to describe. I could have easily read the book at 9-10, so I find it to be a bit too simple.

For a final book I’m going to talk about a book I haven’t read yet, but is very high on my list. The Extraordinary Education of Nicholas Benedict. This is a prequel to a series I loved. It isn't too hard of  read, but it is written for kids who feel a bit different, or a bit smarter than other kids. In middle school I loved these books, and I still do when rereading them. It’s about how sometimes being different is a good thing.

I think it’s important to read and that it matters. Literature is important people! May your life be as awesome as you are and DFTBA!

Dating BEDA

So when I dated my first boyfriend a little while back I learned people have some very strong feelings on the subject of dating in school. Like very strong. Some people think its stupid to date young, some think it's stupid not to. So I figured why not make that my next topic sense I was recently asked out again. (Said No, but not the point)

One, I think that not dating at all in high school is stupid. Before you start dating you don't know anything about how relationships work. I learned from my first one that you have to talk and trust each other in reality as well as theory. Also have things in common. When I grow up I'd like to have a family and I want kids before I'm 30. So starting real dating with a good deal of what is good and what isn't is a good idea. 

Two, I don't think you need to be constantly dating. There are other parts of the experience. Friends, grades, clubs, etc matter as well. I think taking time to think about the past is important and you shouldn't feel the need to always be with someone. 

Three, high school relationships are practice for real life. Maybe 1-2 people who date in high school will stay together. Yes you should try to do things right, but you should also know that if it doesn't work out that's fine and normal. You're probably not gonna marry your high school sweetheart. Sorry. 

Four, most high school relationships are stupid. You've been together for 2 months. You're barely infatuated, let alone in love. Just because you go on a date doesn't make your boyfriend and girlfriend. It means you're dating. You don't have to celebrate Anniversaries every week, or month. These things don't make sense to adults because they're silly. 

Five, don't do stupid things. For people who've dated multiple people a good thing to think is this. Think of your worst ex that you had a decent relationship with. Would you regret having done what you're about to do with them? For example, if you're about to do something for the first time, like a first kiss or losing your virginity, think about an ex. Had your first kiss/lost virginity been with them how would you feel? If it is a lot of regret then don't do it. If its gonna matter to you, then be careful who you do it with. Also just don't have sex unless you have $10,000. You'll need it if you get pregnant which you always can. 

I think the most important part is this. Remember that it'll all be okay. It depends on the person that you are and you'll know if it's right. Not every relationship is worth it and that's okay. One day if it's supposed to happen for you it will. 

May life be as awesome as you are and DFTBA!

Best Friends BEDA

So I know this is very late. Too bad. The reason being my best friend/mid twin is here from GA. I'm really happy to have her. 

So we all have best friends. I personally have 4 people who are my best friends. One guy in school, one guy out of school, one girl from school, and my mind twin. I don't think having more than one is a bad thing. I think it's normal. 

My issue is when telling one about the other it feels weird saying my best friend. I know it shouldn't, but it still does. I guess that's because I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings. It's weird though, because they're different types of friendships. 

I never fight with my female friends. Never. I haven't fought with my friend from school,who needs an internet code, in over a year and my mind twin, Alinia, in 6 years. We just get along. 

With the guys it's a different world. We argue about everything. I'll go through periods of time where we aren't talking constantly. One of us will piss another off and it's over stupid stuff, especially with my non-school friend who we will know as Patrick. My school friend, who I haven't come up with an Internet code for yet, is a sweet heart but is oblivious. 

So I guess what I have to say is that best friends matter. I'm really glad we have them. Maybe each relationship is different, but each one is important and a huge part of my life. They've formed a new family for me and I wouldn't have it any other way. 

May your life be as awesome as you are and DFTBA!

Happy Ball of Happy BEDA

So my absolute best friend of life surprised me today. She's coming down from her house that's about 11-13 hours away for the week. I'm literally just shaking and smiling. 

One of my favorite quotes is about happiness. 'Happiness is not a destination. It is a mood, it is not permanent. It comes and goes and if people thought that way then maybe people would find happiness more often.'

So this sudden burst of happy got me thinking about the little moments of happy in life. Psych club, reading a good book, looking at a perfect picture, being with the people I love. These are all happy moments. 

There are also tiny happy moments. When your birthday is on a Saturday, stepping out into the rain in clothes that can get wet, the smell of rain, the smell of my best friend's cologne that is one of the only ones that doesn't irritate me, real letters, or the feeling of safety when your under a fuzzy blanket. 

There are also bigger happy moments. For me the most common one is kinda silly. I love sitting on my friends futon with out whole group of friends yelling and messing around. It changes how I feel about things. This is also things like seeing Hogwarts for the first time in Universal or seeing an old friend.

I want you to think about your happy moments or things that make you laugh. Because I think those things are important. If we learn to appreciate those things and form our own mental happy list then I think we'll all be better for it.

DFTBA and may your life be as awesome as you are!

BEDA? April Fool's Day

So I'm a very huge fan of the vlogbrothers on youtube. Hank Green is doing something called VEDA, or Vlog Every Day in April. So I was thinking about it and I'm gonna do that, except blogging, because I don't vlog. Basically this means that every day, no matter how stupid or crazy I'm gonna find something to talk about.

Today being April 1st, I'm gonna go with April Fool's Day. So basically this is this huge day where everyone pulls pranks. In high school this is a really really stupid day. I'm gonna go over some pranks I remember and why they are or aren't funny.

First, I'd like to share what my eighth grade homeroom teacher told us all. "Pranks are funny if they bend, but not if they break." Basically it's funny if it's reversible, but if it isn't fixable, costs money, or is too serious it is a bad prank.  

So in my school at least this is the day when you avoid the bathrooms in the morning. You have girls running out in tears crying to teachers or boyfriends about the positive pregnancy test they took. Some girls go really far and even buy the fake ones. This is really, really stupid. It says you have no respect for yourself, and if you tell a guy this it is really scary. When your fifteen this isn't funny. When you are thirty this isn't funny. If it is actually possible for a guy to have gotten you pregnant don't joke about it. This is however, pretty funny if your a guy.

Last year my friend's mom called her and said she'd been in a car accident and was in the hospital. Again, so not funny. She was really driving late at night (nurse) and could have been serious about it. Car accidents aren't a joke, because of how serious they are in real life. 

My older cousin was born on April Fool's Day. So when my aunt was pregnant with my younger cousin and he was due around the same time she called my mom at around seven thirty AM and said she was in labor. It was hilarious, because it had actually happened before and didn't matter. It was a Saturday. No one was late, no one was hurt. When she called five minutes later and said it was a joke they all laughed about it. 

Other fun harmless pranks are silly things like "Happy anniversary!" "I can't wait to see what you have planned for later." "Dude I spent hours studying for the test last night. Are you ready?" Or even more stupid things like salt on a toothbrush, unplugging someone's mouse, flipping a backpack inside out, or poking holes in a water bottle.

I'm all for a good prank. I've been a part of a few. I think that some people don't understand that there are lines you can't cross. Some things can never be unsaid or undone, regardless of the knowledge it was a joke. So Happy April Fool's Day everyone! I'll have a few links to fabulous pranks below, and I hope life is as awesome as you are.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wwmdf5m9khg

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WjZWHuKQfnY

Thinking...

So maybe I think too much and have too many opinions. In real life though, I am awful at voicing my opinions. Maybe it’s just me, or maybe it’s you too.

Some of my best friends know me as Liz, and so that’s who I am here. I’m from Miami, which isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. I’m braving the world of high school, and sometimes I wonder why people think or say things.

Most people know that until you know me I’m really quiet. I’m not really shy, I’m just an introvert. This means I’m awful at saying things spur of the moment, and I need to really know an environment is safe before I share my thoughts. I’ve realized over time though that online that faded away. It lessens my need for acceptance, so here I can say what I’m thinking.

I’m not the only one who feels this way sometimes, and a few of my friends have started vlogging, or video blogging. I love the idea, but when I sit down with a camera pointed at me I’m instantly awkward and socially incompetent again.

I’m probably gonna be on here a lot. Whenever someone days something that makes me really think, or mentions something I have a lot to say about or just am enjoying the Internet and want to share. And like I said, maybe I think too much, but that’s okay.

If you want to introduce yourself, or have anything to say do so… I’m kinda new to this so I don’t know how it works yet.  I’d love to know someone out there is reading this.

DFTBA and I hope your life is as amazing as you are!